Dr Ray Stantz: Everything was fine with our system until the power grid was shut off by dickless here.Our D-Bag O' the Day comes courtesy of Reason Hit & Run (a worthy blog to follow regardless of your political orientation). Guess what gay marriage advocate Gavin Newsom is up to when not busy destroying straight marriages? Turns out the Duke—errrr, Mayor (it's hard to keep these tyrannical titles straight)—of San Francisco believes adults are incapable of making their own life decisions, so he will treat them like children. Emperor—excuse me, Mayor—Newsom has decreed that vending machines on city property can no longer sell sugar-added beverages, and must offer healthy beverages including soy milk and rice milk. Apparently, people in San Francisco are incredibly stupid, and have been getting fat because they don't know enough to avoid sugary drinks, or can't figure out they can pack soy milk from home to drink at lunch.
Walter Peck: They caused an explosion!
Mayor: Is this true?
Dr. Peter Venkman: Yes it's true. This man has no dick.
Or maybe, just maybe, San Francisco adults are smart enough to know that sugary drinks aren't nutritious, but choose to drink them anyway, just like they make any number of other less-than-optimal lifestyle decisions. What next? Ban alcohol and tobacco city-wide? Outlaw automobiles and guns within the city limits? Put city workers in padded playpens at the office, with Czar—pardon me, Mayor—Newsom personally coming by to tuck them in for a nap after lunch, but only reading them a Curious George book if they first eat all of their veggie and tofu casserole? Where does the pompous paternalism end? Mark my words: This year—Soy Milk. Next year—Soylent Green. You have been warned ...
How about a sugar-loaded beverage
to celebrate my "Parent of the Year" award?