March 25, 2012

Another Silly Rule at the Horseshoe

"There are some remedies worse than the disease."

~Publius Syrus, "Maxim 301"

Last week, I had to travel to Omaha to take an examination under oath (basically a deposition in an insurance claim investigation, usually when fraud is suspected). When the insured failed to show (not uncommon, as it is easier to drop a bogus claim than risk legal trouble from lying under oath), I found myself with a couple of hours to kill. As often happens, my car dropped me off at the Horseshoe.

It was mid-afternoon on a Monday, so there were only two $1/$3 NLHE games running, with a long list. After a 30-minute wait, they finally opened a new game, giving me a little less than two hours of playing time. I managed to make the most of it, racking up for $525 profit, mostly from a young gun running two all-in bluffs into my made straights. Thank you, come again!

Although my card-playing was pretty boring, the Horseshoe's idiosyncratic rules once again caused some commotion. I've previously written (see HERE and HERE) about the Shoe's silly betting line and all-in rules; to their credit, the Shoe's managers have now abandoned those rules. The Shoe no longer requires all-in hands to be shown in cash games, which brings the room in line with every other poker room I've played in, and encourages looser all-in bets and calls (always good for the game). The Shoe also now disregards the betting line on the table, which is now merely advisory (though that rule change leads to its own set of problems, particularly when chips are cut in front of cards but behind the line.).

The Shoe's poker room management jealously guards its place in the wacky poker rule pantheon, and only dropped those two quirky rules because they adopted an even more mischief-inducing rule, to wit:

At showdown, a player must table both cards face up. If a player attempting to table his cards has one or both cards land on the table face down, the player's hand is dead, even if the player's intent was to table his hand, and even if the cards do not touch the muck pile.

Of course, this rule isn't posted anywhere, so I am paraphrasing the rule as explained to me by several dealers and regular players throughout my session. But during the course of play, the rule was enforced several times, usually at the insistence of the obvious regulars in the game. In two instances, the rule nearly caused a serious problem.

In the first instance, a large pot developed between three players, with a river Jack putting two Jacks on a rather draw-heavy board. After the river went check-check-check, a lady rolled over a Jack and said, "All I've got is trip Jacks." The next player mucked, but the last player loudly insisted the lady's hand was dead because both cards were not tabled face up. The dealer told the player to roll his hand, which was a busted draw, and the dealer then awarded the pot to the lady, but with a stern warning that any future infractions would result in her hand being ruled dead.

In the second hand, the player in the 8 seat (immediately to my right), was in late position. The flop was 5-5-7 with two of a suit. It checked to the 8 seat, who bet and was called in two spots. The turn brought a 6. Again the action checked to the 8 seat, who again bet and was again called in two spots. The river brought the Ace of the flush draw suit. An early position player bet big, next player folded, and the 8 seat thought and then called. The early position player showed AK for two pair. The 8 seat went to table his cards in front of him (well clear of the muck), and the cards somehow caught on his fingers, over-rotated, landed on their edges, then flipped over face down. The other player immediately declared, "That's a dead hand!" The 8 seat reached out and rolled over K5 for flopped trips, which would have been the winning hand. The dealer declared the hand dead, but the 8 seat protested. The dealer called the floor, and the dealer described what had occurred. The 8 seat stated he had been trying to table his hand, and that since he had bet his trips on two streets and called the river, there was no way he had been trying to fold. The floor asked the dealer if the 8 seat had been trying to table his cards; the dealer (to his credit) stated it looked like the 8 seat had been trying to table his hand. The floor then ruled that the hand was live, but cautioned the 8 seat that his ruling was an exception to the usual rule, and that his hand normally would have been ruled dead.

When I asked the table about the rule, several regulars and two dealers told me that the rule had been implemented "to prevent angle-shooting". Now I'm clearly in favor of encouraging players to follow proper showdown protocols, but this rule seems to cause more problems than it solves. First, this rule appears to be unique to the Shoe, and involves a rather important part of play (the showdown). Players who are not regulars in the room can be taken advantage of by regular players familiar with the rule. Second, and to my mind more important, the rule is excessively punitive, resulting in what is generally a winning hand being declared dead. Poker rooms should be in the business of awarding pots to players who hold the strongest hand on hands that go to a showdown, not looking for reasons to rule a hand dead on a technicality. Finally, there are already plenty of rules regarding various showdown angle shots. If a player somehow causes a problem by only tabling one card at showdown, or by fake-mucking then showing a hand, enforce the rules already on the books and handle the situation accordingly.

The Shoe's new showdown rule is like curing a hangnail by amputating the finger. It's effective, but makes it tough to do chip tricks.

March 24, 2012

Rube Goldberg Showdowns

Dr. Evil:  All right guard, begin the unnecessarily slow-moving dipping mechanism.

[guard starts dipping mechanism]

Dr. Evil:  Close the tank!

Scott Evil:  Wait, aren't you even going to watch them? They could get away!

Dr. Evil:  No no no, I'm going to leave them alone and not actually witness them dying. I'm just gonna assume it all went to plan. What?

Scott Evil:   I have a gun, in my room, you give me five seconds, I'll get it, I'll come back down here, BOOM, I'll blow their brains out!

Dr. Evil:  Scott, you just don't get it, do ya? You don't.

~Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery (1997)

Forgive me while I channel a little Poker Grump.

Showdowns in poker should be quick and orderly. The last aggressor (bettor or raiser) to act is called by one or more players. The last aggressor turns his hand face up on the table, showing both cards (unless he chooses to muck). If there was no betting on the river, the player in earliest position tables his hand (unless by house rule the last aggressor in the prior round of betting is required to show first). The remaining callers then table their hands going in clockwise order from the first player required to show his hand (again unless they choose to muck). The dealer reads the tabled hands and pushes the pot to the winner. Lather, rinse, repeat.

Based on my recent trip to Vegas, as well as recent sessions at the Horseshoe in Council Bluffs and at Harrah's in Kansas City, showdowns have devolved into an overly complicated, poorly choreographed dance routine. I'll bet at least once every couple of hours I have been involved in a showdown that goes something like this:

  • Yahoo bets.
  • I call.
  • Yahoo stares at me.
  • I stare back.
  • Yahoo says, "I have a ten," which, if true, gives him second pair on the board.
  • I gesture, making a couple of small circles with my forefinger, indicating he should show his cards.
  • Yahoo holds up one card in the air, showing he does in fact have a ten.
  • I gesture again, making a couple of slower, larger circles with my finger, hoping he catches on.
  • Yahoo stares at me.
  • I stare back.
  • Yahoo tables his hand, either showing only the ten, or placing his cards carefully so the ten is on top of his other card, hiding it.
  • I gesture again.
  • Yahoo shoots me a death glare, finally tables his hand with both cards visible.
  • I either table or muck my hand.

The whole routine is incredibly annoying and needlessly slows the game. The "hold one card up in the air in lieu of an actual showdown" dance seems to be almost endemic, occurring at least once or twice per orbit. What part of showdown is giving players trouble? Show your damn cards, and put them down on the table. Trust me, it's easy.

Now I'm not getting petulant about showdowns because I'm a rules nit. In many situations, I don't care enough to get picky about showdown order. For example, a bunch of players limp preflop, and then there is no betting on later streets. Usually, a small pair or even Ace-high is good, so when everyone is sitting around waiting for someone to show, I'll jump start the process by just tabling my hand. Or, if I happen to make a pretty big hand for the board, I'll just declare and table my hand, again to jump start the action.

However, if I'm in a decent-sized pot, and there has been betting action on all streets, I am very interested in seeing my opponent's hand, even if I lose the pot. I want to know both cards in order to see how his hand matches up with the betting action. Was he floating or check-raising with air and caught a pair? Was he semi-bluffing with a pair and a draw, or betting naked draws for pot control? In these situations, I am entitled to see my opponent's hand first; as some players are fond of saying, I paid for that privilege. I'm not looking to cause a scene, but I don't think it's too much to ask that my opponent table his hand without delay when I call his bet or raise on the river.

As you might expect, Poker Grump has written on showdown etiquette on several occasions; see HERE and HERE for his posts dealing with the "showing one card" issue, as well as HERE and HERE for some related (and entirely meritorious) showdown grumpiness. Grump's theory was that the "showing one card" routine originated in home games. I suspect there is some home game influence to the phenomenon, but I personally think the issue is also somewhat generational. Most of the flagrant and recurrent offenders seem generally to be in their early-to-mid-20s, a group that also seems far more likely to commit other poker etiquette faux pas, like talking about their hand during action, calling the clock too quickly, hollywooding during routine decisions, or slow rolling at showdown. These players likely cut their poker teeth online, where many live game etiquette matters are either handled automatically by the software, or simply have no online analogue. Be that as it may, if a player sits down at a live poker game, that player has an obligation to know and follow not only the rules but also the generally accepted etiquette for live action poker.

To be blunt:  Just turn your cards over and put them on the table already.



February 26, 2012

IMOP-VII: Official Preview

"You're making a huge misstep."

~Daniel Plainview (Daniel Day-Lewis), There Will Be Blood (2007)

The holidays have come and gone. Football is over for another season. Winter lingers. Our attention returns to college basketball. The old itch returns.

Tilted tourists. Five team parlays. Insane prop bets. Goosing and juicing. Fourball rampages. Ugly suckouts. Uglier jackets.

Yes, it's time for the Ironman of Poker. Consider this your ten-day warning.

Our fearless leader, Santa Claus, returns in his role as Cruise Director and Chief Cat Herder. Santa has just released the official invite for this year's festivities.  Here are some of the highlights.

Official Theme:  "There Will Be Blood"

"I drink your Caipirinha. I drink it all up."

Seems a rather fitting theme. Considering the number of folks who have been tilted by the IMOP crew's hijinks, it's rather astonishing that we've made it six years without a physical altercation (other than a certain dunk Brit tackling me at Bally's). Frankly, it's a miracle that one of the "Killer Bs" (Barbie, Bonnie, and Mr. Chow) hasn't been taken for a one-way desert joyride. Perhaps that will be one of the official prop bets this year ...

Bonnie fosters some international goodwill
with a random Canadian on IMOP-V.

Official Signature Hand:  "The Honey Badger"

Each year, the Ironmen are required to play a particular "signature hand" that has been generally overlooked or even disparaged by most poker "experts". Last year, in honor of the sixth IMOP, the signature hand was "the Grump" (deuce-four). This year, Santa has cleverly extrapolated and come up with the signature hand of ...

Deuce-Five. Henceforth known as "The Honey Badger".

In a new twist, to score points, not only must the signature hand be shown, but the player must give a "Honey Badger" quote.





Official Catchphrase:  "Ta Da!"

This year, Santa has added a twist on a classic category, the official tilt-inducing catchphrase. This particular catchphrase originated in the IMOP home game this winter. Barbie, as he is wont to do, made two preposterous calls with air against River Joe, then rivered a gutterball straight for a monsterpotten. When Barbie rolled over his hand, River Joe was livid and the rest of the Ironmen were stunned. Figuring he needed to break the tension, Barbie spread his hands palms up like a magician and cheerfully said,

"Ta da!"

River Joe was not amused. The rest of the Ironmen were. A classic tilt-inducing catchphrase was born.




Official Miscellanea & Etceteria: 

Many traditional events return, including daily tournaments which cannot be revealed publicly, as one of the tasks for the new pledges will be to find the Ironmen for each tournament (private message me on Twitter if you want to join us for a tourney*; or follow the IMOP Twitter list to avoid our crew entirely). Also returning are the Ugly Jacket Dinner (wherein the Ironmen descend on a fine eating establishment and class up the joint with vintage-for-a-reason sports coats), the Third World Poker Tour (wherein the Ironmen do charity work in some of the less fortunate Vegas poker rooms), and the FuKaaw! Golf Classic (wherein some of the Ironmen play a round of nighttime combat golf).

*Caution:  Some Tebowing required.


Let the hijinks begin, and may hilarity ensue!

"Why are you acting insane and threatening to cut my throat?"

~H.M. Tilford (David Warshofsky), There Will Be Blood (2007)

February 03, 2012

Poker Player's Cheatsheet for Surviving the Super Bowl

”Cards are war, in disguise of a sport."

~Charles Lamb, "Essays of Elia" (1832)

Vinny Gambini:  You stick out like a sore thumb around here.
Mona Lisa Vito:  Me? What about you?
Vinny Gambini:   I fit in better than you. At least I'm wearing cowboy boots.
Mona Lisa Vito:   Oh yeah, you blend.

~My Cousin Vinny (1992)

Saturday night, I played a four hour session at the Meadows ATM. I managed a tidy profit playing ABC poker. I picked off a couple of bluffs from the table maniac, and had big pocket pairs hold up against overplayed top pair hands. It was nice to knock some rust off my game, and it was reassuring that my reads are still pretty solid. Not a bad prep session for the rapidly approaching IMOP festivities.

Although there wasn't any poker-related hilarity, there was a ton of sports talk. Topics ranged from the Super Bowl to college basketball to golf (Tiger Woods and the Abu Dhabi tourney) to tennis (the Australian Open). Although there was a little shop talk thrown in (there was another lawyer and an insurance guy in the game), most of the chit chat revolved around sports, which reminded me of a couple of Tweets from two of my poker friends a month or so ago. Chris (a/k/a @MrsLedr) Tweeted:
"The biggest downside of being a female poker player? The nonstop sports talk. #notinterested"
Poker Grump replied:
"You don't have to be female for that to be a problem. Also: TVs with nothing but sports. A news feed with closed captions, please."
I'm certainly sympathetic to poker players being held captive to conversations that bore them. Poker players who aren't interested in sports are probably in much the same position as I find myself when I hang out with the sig other and his gal pals, and they discuss the latest twists in MTV's Teen Mom or Bravo's Real Housewives of Atlanta (or Orange County, or Jakarta, whatever)—boredom and annoyance—with the added regret that ritual suicide is generally -EV in most target rich poker games.

For better or worse, however, sports are currently the lingua franca of the live poker world. Most of my college poker buddies were also the guys with whom I played intramurals, fantasy football, and sports pools, and I suspect many poker players have a similar sports-rich background. In many casinos, poker rooms are located near if not immediately adjacent to sports books, hardly surprising given the known sports betting leak of many poker players, including a number of the big name live game players like Phil Ivey and Doyle Brunson. In the online poker world, sports chatter is (or was) easier to ignore, part of the friendlier environment for women poker players or even many of the male young guns who seem closer to Big Bang Theory nerds than Varsity Blues jocks. Still, if poker players plan to spend any time in a live poker game setting, they better brush up on current sports news if they intend to maximize their profits at the poker tables.

The sig other and I watch Big Brother every summer. The game involves physical and mental competitions, along with scheming and backstabbing as players form and dissolve alliances. But the players also take into account "social game"—the friendships players build with other players, even those in opposing alliances, in order to build in social safety nets to stave off elimination in tight votes and to assist their advancement in the game as new alliances coalesce. It's possible to win Big Brother without regard to social game, but generally speaking, better social game players have more success than those players viewed as outsiders because they are odd, aloof, aggressive, or even hostile.

Turning back to poker, knowledge of sports isn't necessary to play poker well and profitably. But live poker rewards social factors to a greater degree than the more mathematical online game. At low stakes games, at least, players are in the game in large part for the entertainment factor; they want to recreate the backslapping, bullshitting bonhomie of their home game. Players who talk the talk—those who trade some barbs, make some jokes, and chatter about sports—are part of the gang. Players who are notably quiet, aloof, or too serious about the game are outsiders, viewed with suspicion. I find that when I'm playing my good ol' boy role, I benefit from players letting down their guard, playing too loosely, giving off too many tells, and taking it easy on me when they have me beat. Conversely, I observe many players who are not sociable at the table attracting unwanted attention and aggression, to the detriment of their games.

Because being able to talk sports is a valuable skill for live poker players, here are a few talking points for sports-averse poker players to keep in mind when playing poker this week, if they want to blend:

The Super Bowl "Rematch":  Four years ago, the Giants met the Patriots in Super Bowl XLII. The Patriots were 18-0 and heavily favored to win their fourth franchise Super Bowl, while also looking to become only the second NFL team to go undefeated for a full season, and the first to go 19-0 (the '72 Dolphins went 17-0 before the NFL expanded in teams, regular season games, and playoff games). The Giants pulled off the stunning upset with a late game rally featuring perhaps the most amazing play in Super Bowl history—a scrambling escape by Giants' quarterback Eli Manning, who connected with David Tyree for a jaw-dropping against-the-helmet catch to keep their winning drive alive (better known as simply "The Helmet Catch" or "Catch-42"):



If you want to needle a Patriots fan, simply mention "The Helmet Catch" and go on and on about how amazing and historic it was, throwing in what a shame it was for the Patriots to blow their chance at being the greatest team in NFL history. If you want to blend in with Patriots fans, simply grouse a bit about how Eli Manning should've have been ruled down because he was "in the grasp" of the defenders.

The Quarterbacks:  To blend, you really don't need to know any players other than the quarterbacks. The Patriots' Tom Brady is the rags-to-riches pretty boy, a decent but not amazing prospect from Michigan. Expected by many fans to be nothing more than a career backup or journeyman starter, Brady got his big break early in his second season when starter Drew Bledsoe suffered a serious injury. Brady started the rest of the season, and led the Patriots to a Super Bowl XXVI win over the then-juggernaut and defending Super Bowl champion St. Louis Rams.  Since then, Brady has set a number of passing records, won two league and two Super Bowl MVP awards, won two more Super Bowl rings, married a supermodel, and probably walks on water in the off-season. If you want to needle a Patriots fan, call Brady a "system quarterback" who owes his success to evil genius coach Bill Belichek, and who will never be as great as Joe Montana.

The Giants' Eli Manning is the (to now) least-heralded member of the Manning Quarterback clan, taking a back seat to father Archie Manning and big brother Peyton Manning (the long-time, but not for long, quarterback of the Indianapolis Colts, whose stadium is hosting the Super Bowl). In the 2004 NFL draft, Eli caused some muttering with his prima donna-ish demands to be traded from the San Diego Chargers to the NY Giants; the Chargers relented and acquired the talented but whiny Philip Rivers in the trade. Eli was generally regarded by fans as erratic, lackadaisical, and simply less talented than big brother Peyton. Since the Super Bowl win four years ago, however, Eli has developed into one of the league's elite quarterbacks. A win Sunday would certainly give him a solid claim to the "best Manning" title. For amusement Sunday, watch for "Manning face", the overly expressive looks given by Eli (and Peyton) when something goes poorly. If you have a Colts fan at your table, needle him by claiming Eli is a better quarterback than Peyton.

The Coaches:  There will be a lot of sideline shots of the head coaches, because head coaches are generally regarded as football demi-gods. The Patriots' Bill Belichik is a polarizing figure, regarded as either the greatest football genius since the 49ers Bill Walsh, or an evil genius who is an obsessive-compulsive cheater. Frankly, I think both sides are entirely correct. In any event, for fun at the poker tables, find a player in a hoodie (tough, I know), and suggest that he is imitating Belichik's fashion style.

The Giants' Tom Coughlin is the old guy who always looks extremely constipated, and resembles the nits who need the board cards read to them by the dealer. Really, there's nothing to joke about here, and if you do, Coughlin will likely kill you with a withering glare.

The Wagers:  The Super Bowl is the biggest sports-investing event of the year. The lines for the standard bets—the spread and the over/under (a/k/a points total)—are generally in the neighborhood of the Patriots -3 (Patriots are favored to win by 3 points) and 55 (the total points scored by both teams will be over or under 55). The Super Bowl also has many casinos offering "prop bets" on specific events occurring, such as a player getting more or less than a certain number of yards, which player will score first, the game-opening coin toss, the number of times a celebrity will appear on TV, and the length of the national anthem. For fun, look up some wackier prop bets online and annoy the table as you pretend to track those bets at the table. To be uber-annoying, wait for someone at the table to talk about betting on the coin toss, then launch into a lengthy explanation as to why the bet is -EV and no better than betting on red/black at roulette.

The Profit:  When playing against poker players who are sweating wagers on a sports event, their attention will be on the sports event more than their cards. They will play more straightfoward, making fewer bluffs and being susceptible to bluffs or aggressive squeeze plays, c-bets, and semi-bluffs. If they lose their sports wagers, they will likely be on tilt or on the edge of tilt, particularly if they are also a fan of the team that lost. This is where your tolerance of the sports talk pays dividends. Needle them gently about the game ("Did the Patriots cover? Oh, I guess that missed field goal was a big deal, huh?"), then take their cash when they blow up!

Super Bowl + taunting + ??? = Profit!!

January 23, 2012

Gin Night at the Meadows

Gin card: In poker, a card that gives two players strong but different hands. Usually, one player will make the strongest possible hand (often referred to as the "nuts"), while the other player will make a very strong but losing hand (e.g., a card gives one player a flush and another player a straight or smaller flush, or one player makes quads while another player makes a full house).* Alternatively, getting the specific card(s) one needs to make one's hand (e.g., hitting a set or an inside straight draw).


Last week, I made my Ali-like return to the Meadows ATM, where I hadn't played in several months. But, my buddy Santa Claus was in town for work, so we met up for Jethro's BBQ and some poker. After stuffing myself with smoked brisket, pulled pork, and andouille sausage, it was off to the Meadows poker room.

The crowd was typical for a Wednesday night, with eight or nine tables in action for the mid-week tournament. Santa and I had to wait only a few minutes before getting into a new $1/$2 NLHE cash game with several tournament bustouts. Seat selection is a key skill for poker success, so I made the important strategic decision to sit in the 3 seat. Santa, however, unwisely chose the 2 seat.

The game started rather tight, typical for a mid-week game. After a couple of orbits, I found As5s in the big blind. Shockingly, a bunch of us all limped. The flop was junky with a couple of hearts and one spade. A bad player two to my left bet $10, and I called along with the hijack, thinking my Ace might be live and figuring I could represent the flush if a heart hit. The turn was a big spade, giving me the backdoor flush draw. I checked, bad player bet $25, hijack called, and I called. River was a baby spade. Gin! I bet out $50, bad player called, and hijack folded. I rolled over the nuts and hilarity ensued. My opponent stared at the board and my hand, then commenced angry, non-stop muttering until he busted out a few hands later. As Dusty Schmidt says, "Just like in the porn industry, you need to backdoor it if you really want to get paid."

An orbit later, I was back in the blinds. A couple of aggressive guys who had busted out of the tournament had joined the game. Most of the table limped preflop, and I closed the action checking my option with JTo. The flop came down 9-8-3 rainbow. I checked, aggro guy in middle position bet $10, aggro in hijack called, and I called. Turn came a Queen. Gin! Believing in the theory that the best way to get money in the pot is to put money in the pot, I led out with a $25 bet. I was hoping to get one caller. Instead, first aggro guy raised to $50, then the next aggro guy pushed all-in for roughly $150. With the action back on me, I paused a moment, trying to figure out what was going on. The turn had put a backdoor flush draw on board, but I had one of that suit, so I couldn't be up against a freerolling straight with a flush redraw. I decided the worst case for me was to be dodging a flush draw and a set, and there's no way I could fold the current nuts even though those draws were live. The other guy had roughly $200 left behind, and I decided if he could call the current raise, he could call my push. So, I pushed, and he snap-called. I rolled my hand, and both opponents rolled over ... Q-9 for top two pair. Ruh roh Rooby! That's about as good as I could hope for. Variance was kind, and the river rolled off a blank. I scooped a nice pot, and a few hands later, racked up and cashed out with a tidy profit.

Santa, meanwhile, stuck to his silly Seat 2 strategy. I headed home to celebrate Gin Night:





--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

* I've used the term "gin card" for years, as have several of my poker buddies. Interestingly, I was unable to find a definitive origin for the phrase, but did find several references going back to 2006 using the term, including United Poker Forum (May 2007), Full Contact Poker (August 2007), Two Plus Two (September 2009) (though the forum archives reference the term much earlier in strategy posts dating back at least to 2006), Poker News (November 2009), and the Durrrr Challenge website (December 2010).

The earliest reference I could find was in the Two Plus Two archives where there is discussion in 2005 about a blog post by Daniel Negreanu where he reports hitting his "gin card" and losing:

From his blog he says, "The flop came A-A-10 and I was pretty sure that my opponent had A-K, K-K, Q-Q, or maybe even AA or JJ. He checked and I checked. The turn was my gin card, an 8. Or not... the dude had four aces! Goodbye."

In any event, although the exact moment where "gin card" crossed over into the poker lexicon is probably lost to the mists of time, I think it's safe to say the phrase probably came into vogue sometime around the Moneymaker boom.